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Tag Archives: life

Take Center Stage of your OWN life

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“Use your life to serve this world” – those words spoken by Oprah last Wednesday, seemed to have been sent straight to me, as if we had been sipping tea together swapping life stories. For me, seeing Oprah take her final bow was an emotional rollercoaster – hanging on to every last wise word (and saving it on my pvr to view again and again). Since a very young age, I have always believed that one day our paths will cross and I will be sitting across from her sharing our passion for assisting others to find theirs.

Oprah was the beginning for me – a glimpse into a life of possibility, she offered a different story, where girls triumphed and your dreams were possible. And now more than ever, it all seems to make sense.

Our job in this crazy amazing life is simply to just find our calling – find what ignites our souls, makes us laugh, brings us joy, gives us peace. And although now I cannot imagine being on a different path I am currently on, it has taken me years to come to this place and without all those moments before I know I would not be here. But now more than ever I realize that a calling is not just a job, a company or job title – it is a lifestyle, an attitude, a way of living.

So I hope you are ready to take center stage in your own life – to stop hiding behind fear and insecurities and to be proud to share your insane beauty, your shining light and your magic.

xo nicki

29 years of life…

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Well today marks the date of my 29th birthday and I feel blessed. Every year at the time of my birthday I embark on a journey inwards to check in with myself – trudge through the waters, dig a little deeper and climb a little closer. Thinking that this is the last year in my 20’s has shifted something miraculous within me- giving me an opportunity to reflect on this decade and what it has brought to my life, how my experiences have moulded me to be the person I am at this very moment.

I wish I could have spoken to my younger self at 21 and shared with her all the things I have learnt along the way – that boys and bodies don’t matter if you aren’t being true to yourself. That you can’t find happiness, true happiness, looking for someone else to fulfil that within you – it has to radiate from your beautiful heart.

I am a big fan of living life and although I feel that part of my 20’s I desperately looked for accolades and approval from everyone but myself, I have had an amazing blessed life. I have an amazing family, beautiful friends, an unbelievable husband, a breathtaking child; but now most importantly I have me, the real me, the me that dances in the sun.

So as I embark on my 29th year, I feel fulfilled beyond measure, secure in my strengths, embracing my flaws and ready to keep on shining.

xo nicki

The Accountablility Factor

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I always shake my head when I hear people complain about how unhappy they are with their current circumstances and although I do often do this myself, I know better…. I know that everyone one of us has the ability to simply change and find the happiness within that circumstance. I know that looking at the positive will not only change your outlook, it will change your opportunities.

It’s a hard pill to swallow for some people to realize they hold the key to their own happiness – personally I find it empowering, the greatest adventure, my reason for living. I have never understood ‘choosing miserable’, ‘choosing hard’ or ‘choosing struggle’ – who wants to spend their life-like that?

At the end of the day, you are only accountable to yourself – you and you alone- and regardless of your circumstance, situation or past choices, start today. Today instead of struggle, choose peace, choose happiness, choose joy because there is no one telling you otherwise.

xo nicki

Beauty in Words…entry #6

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“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, not to worry about the future, or not to anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.”
Buddha

I stumbled upon this quote and got me a thinkin’- I really struggle with living in the current moment. I generally am always moving forward, thinking into the future and focusing on creating it but its not too often throughout the day that I just ‘be’.

As the month of ‘ME’vember begins to wrap up, I have realized several things about myself and what I need to work on and this is at the top of my list. Logically I know this, I’ve read books on it (The Power of Now anyone?) but for some reason it just doesn’t stick, perhaps subconsciously I am hitting the eject button over and over again and its not until I see something like this that it reigns me back in and refocuses me.

I certainly spend to much time anticipating the future, planning and mapping it out; far to much time remembering what it was like to be young and I seem to forget the middle part- the here, the right now. This is the only truth; we are never guaranteed our tomorrows and focusing on our past only seems to make us miss our opportunities now.

xo nicki

Through the eyes of a child…

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I can remember back to when I was a child and think of the pure delight in experiencing new things and just how amazing the world looked to me. As we get older, we tend to get more jaded; there are bills to be paid, deadlines to be met, decisions to be made and somehow we loose that innocence…

Last Thursday it snowed here for the first time this year and the first time in my son’s life. Capturing all those ‘1st s’ for him is really important to me as a mother and creating those lasting memories (even if just by means of my memory) but what I didn’t realize was that in that moment, I too get to recapture my innocence in experiencing those moments.

So we bundled right up- to the point where he could barely move his small limbs, threw our boots on, opened the door to the rush of cold air against our cheeks and took a step into an new and unknown world to him. The snowflakes were large and magical- the kind that are always in the movies- and seemed to tickle his cheeks; he was smiling, eyes wide open in awe and curiosity- my heart melted.

We didn’t stay out for long, we didn’t need too and although he will never remember that moment, it has now become imbedded in my heart. I too that day, felt the snowflakes and the softness of them against my cheeks and any other worry seemed to melt away as fast as they were landing on my skin.

So whether you have children or not, its not hard to try to look at the world through their eyes and recapture some of the innocence we seem to loose along the way- just take a moment, or two or three and close your eyes and remember what it was like to be 5 and not have a care in the world- pure peace.

xo nicki

Beauty in Words…entry #5

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“There is a subtle difference between a mission and a promise. A mission is something you strive to accomplish – a promise is something you are compelled to keep. One is individual, the other is shared. When a mission and a promise are one and the same… that’s when mountains are moved and races are won”.~ Hala Moddelmog

I love a good Starbucks- pumpkin spice lattes, gingerbread lattes and plain old tea always seem to taste better there and I think it has to do with the cups. Reading “The Way I See It” on each cup always made me feel like I was cuddled up with an old friend ready to have a deeply inspiring conversation about life. It appears the campaign is over but I still have a few of the quotes cut out and hanging on my bulletin board in my office, so I thought I would share some of them and why I was compelled to cut them out.

I love being on a mission, the idea of having concrete goals just waiting for me around the corner, really gets me moving in life. I will never be the person who just stops and says “OK, I think I’m good now”. I really believe there is always more to see and do and there is especially always room to grow- to become better than we could ever imagine.

I have been on lots of short missions over the years and always think of them as mini mountains in one very large mountain range- ups and down, bumps, bad weather, rocky starts and uplifting victory’s- you coast downhill sometimes but hit rugged terrain around the next corner. But I love what this quote is saying when you combine the two- a mission and a promise and what can be accomplished because of that commitment. So many of my missions & goals in life are ones that I keep to myself or a few select people in my life but this quotes reminds me of the power that when we share ideas and dreams, we really can move mountains.

xo nicki

‘ME’vember

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I seriously debated writing this blog post but came to the conclusion, why the hell not! Believe it or not there are still some things that are so close to me that it scares me to share them with the few of you that read this but here goes nothing!

At the beginning of November I declared it “ME’vember (this was in my head because actually saying it out loud requires accountability)…after having a few sessions with a counsellor to discuss the impact my injury/disability was having, I made the decision to get on with life but that required a little ‘reinvention’. You know when your young and break up with a boyfriend, you absolutely have to go for a makeover- hair was always the first place I started and hitting the gym was the next- well I needed to go through a similar process.

Now I didn’t literally ‘break-up’ with anyone but I did need to say goodbye (a goodbye that took a year and a half) to my old self- the running, stiletto wearing, always on the go Nicki. This is where peace began for me- acceptance that I may never be able to do those things ever again and to be ok with that.

So for the last 2 weeks, I have been doing just that. I started by going on a cleanse- some of it was to kick start shedding the last 10 pounds I need to get rid of but mostly it was to centre myself inwards relying on self control, I died my hair, nothing extreme but got rid of the greys that keep creeping in, cut my bangs so I didn’t look like I was wearing a helmet, bought a few new pieces of clothing and started to workout, which is giving me my mojo back!

But out of all of this I realized the truest and most saddening part for me- I haven’t given myself permission to be my #1 priority in a really, really long time. The word ‘selfish’ has such a negative connotation but I am now starting to see the beauty in being selfish- if even just for a few minutes each day. The moments I put myself first, whether to workout for 45mins, read a magazine, meditate or write- I become a whole person again and that whole person goes out into the world and is a better wife, mother and friend.

What makes me sad is that I see so many of my friends who are in the same position, we give & give & give and then feel guilty to take a little- well I am here to say ‘lets join together and stop that shit’. So flat boots and new jeans- here I come- just try and stop me!

xo nicki